20th February 2006,
Monday 5.51pm, it's a busy day. Taking things slowly and steadily, one thing at a time. A lot to work on. Just got back from Avillion, a nice place- first time sharing room with other participant, but it was good- coz sharing with Olivia- catching up with her, and shared on the CA memories and updates. Hotel is nice, open air bathroom, I enjoyed the who seminar. The participant very much outgoing and open, they're Singaporean girls, 25 participant, all girls except one guy. We had fun time- most of the participant very young, so we have team building- and also presentation on the different group. I'm in Roman Empire group, and we're given Roman Empire dress, One King's dress- for Caesar and another 4 for ladies, Egyptian dress. So we form a drama, dance for the King, to pick his wife to be. I dance Chinese papar-fan dance. Hmm..not bad, quite fun. We finally won 1st prize- got a free foot massage service, but I gave it away to others coz I got to catch a flight the next day. Learn quite a lot in the seminar. Interaction with the Singaporean gives me some insights. Even though I'm usually quiet, yet I can know a few people, and tht's good enough. Shld need to keep in touch, hope to see them again.
Yeah, Monday Blues. Working life has been okie. A lot things yet to finalize- on new projects and planning for extension of CDR, yet taking my time, slowly. Learn on delegation, and asking God for wisdom each day. Talk to Celina just now, yeah- shared about brother, and family. Last night chat with mum has been in my heart- yeah, expectation again. Why did I placed such high expectation on brother? Have I been understanding enough? I should silence up, and not justify anymore. Rest it to the Lord, and may He guide the family. The life of Job- He gives and He take away, Blessed be the Name of the Lord. Can I praise Him in times of imperfection, in times of shaking? My level of trust, and the stillness. Pr Sam's sermon for Sunday has been good- all come back to the Word of God. How much have we really soak ourselves in the Word of God? Hw passionate are we? How hungry are we? How's our response after the Word? Grieve and repents then what?..then what? What should be the reaction? Take it with joy.. joy in His Word.
Father, forgive me for being lagging in drawing in Your Word. You've run 999 steps to reach out to me, and it requires only a step from me. Forgive me for such lack of faith and trust. Father I wanna run back to Your Word, not by might, not by power but by Your Spirit. Yes, it require a little step, and I'm coming Daddy, please bear with me. Thank you, work in me each day. Through good time or bad time, I know Lord You're near, so near, so so near...praise You Lord. Holy Spirit work deep in me. Thank You! Amen!
Monday, February 20, 2006
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Testing 1,2, 3...Blogging Picture:)
Ehhh...?? Who is this? Cun Babe..."I'm Ms. Dew, call me Peace", her name is Dew_Peace :DDDD
Hehe..never bother to play on the blog till today. Got to wait till 7.30pm for Support-Group dinner. I should write something about myself then, since this can be published. What can I say...Simple, yet deep; Ordinary yet Extra-Cautionary; Gentle& Caring (duh..) yet Complex, Sweet, and Cute- yet Fierce. Soft, and Fragile yet Tough and Stubborn, don't mess with her;)
I remember I put this in my Friendster: "Bipolar-mixed personality;
Chol-Phleg-Melancho-Sang (20%-25%-50%-5%) Loved by JC.
Anyhow, I always been reminded of His Word in Psalms, that's how how my Daddy manufacture me :D
Psalms 139:13-16
13 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise You,
for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
[b] Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
Open the eyes of our Heart, Lord
9th February 2006,
It's 2.13pm, Thurs afternoon. Just took bread for lunch, tonite have a CNY dinner with cancer patient support group. Will be staying in hospital then. I forgotten to ask my pharmcists to attend, no only telling them and they said they got plan already-so later I'll be going alone. Work has been good- planning for new renovation for our new unit. Quite excited over it. Becoming an architect cum pharmacist now, trying to sort out how to renovate my little new castle- the clean-room, the positioning of the emergency shower, getting quotation from suppliers. I guess I'm quite slow- don't know a lot of things, not sure about right procedures, feeling like I'm as if like a gun that shooting randomly, all plan half here half there...maybe I'm too 'tamak' want to do everything- so that at least I touch a little here and there. Good and bad, good coz I'll have wider scope on more projects and more new things to do, but bad- coz it'll lack of depth. But overall, have not receive and bad inputs on my job performance. Boss has been a goodman, even though he's rather quiet, don't really speak a lot, but I work well with him. I have alot flexibility and I don't want to abuse that, will only use if needed. I think boss also trust me a lot. Okay la so far...
Last night Prayer-Drive. I drove around Century Bay apartment, then around BJ court. Our group pray for the Migrant worker: Kasturi, Ps Mei, Ken and Caroline, myself one car. The prayer drive is good, we really sense the presence of God surronds us. Even though the prayer list has been given but the Lord impressed us to pray with new light, new scope. Our car got a lot prayer warriors- Pr Mei and Kasturi and Ken really wonderful people. I always very encourage by this sort of people that so passionate on the work of Ministry. Indeed the harvest field is plentiful- see how the Lord open the door bringing so many migrant worker to Malaysia, Nepal, Vietnamese, Bangladeshi. It's open door, it's time for church to rise up. It's Kairos time- for the churches aroud to wake up and take the call. But why is our heart so complacent and so hard to move? Am questioning myself too- wht is God calling me in the area of evangelism, or mission? Awaken the Sleeping Giant....awaken that sleeping giant, awaken- Wake up. Now is the time! Can't you see it? Open our Spiritual Blindness eyes. The Word is there, the Word is life, how are we receiving it? Are we hungry and long for His Word?
O Lord, forgive us for being sleeping, a sleeping giant. Over contented, complacency, blinded by the worldly system, our eyes has not seen our ear has not heard, our heart has not understand what You're doing admist of us. Forgive us Lord, for building our own houses, and forgetting your altar, Your house. Forgive us for pitching the tents so many times, yet never laid any altar..How wretch of us. Yet You loves us, you loves me and give Your life for me- on the Cross of Calvary. That precious blood, the gift of life, how can we comprehend. Help me not to loose the focus of such love and free gifts. It's time- Open the eyes of my Heart Lord!
It's 2.13pm, Thurs afternoon. Just took bread for lunch, tonite have a CNY dinner with cancer patient support group. Will be staying in hospital then. I forgotten to ask my pharmcists to attend, no only telling them and they said they got plan already-so later I'll be going alone. Work has been good- planning for new renovation for our new unit. Quite excited over it. Becoming an architect cum pharmacist now, trying to sort out how to renovate my little new castle- the clean-room, the positioning of the emergency shower, getting quotation from suppliers. I guess I'm quite slow- don't know a lot of things, not sure about right procedures, feeling like I'm as if like a gun that shooting randomly, all plan half here half there...maybe I'm too 'tamak' want to do everything- so that at least I touch a little here and there. Good and bad, good coz I'll have wider scope on more projects and more new things to do, but bad- coz it'll lack of depth. But overall, have not receive and bad inputs on my job performance. Boss has been a goodman, even though he's rather quiet, don't really speak a lot, but I work well with him. I have alot flexibility and I don't want to abuse that, will only use if needed. I think boss also trust me a lot. Okay la so far...
Last night Prayer-Drive. I drove around Century Bay apartment, then around BJ court. Our group pray for the Migrant worker: Kasturi, Ps Mei, Ken and Caroline, myself one car. The prayer drive is good, we really sense the presence of God surronds us. Even though the prayer list has been given but the Lord impressed us to pray with new light, new scope. Our car got a lot prayer warriors- Pr Mei and Kasturi and Ken really wonderful people. I always very encourage by this sort of people that so passionate on the work of Ministry. Indeed the harvest field is plentiful- see how the Lord open the door bringing so many migrant worker to Malaysia, Nepal, Vietnamese, Bangladeshi. It's open door, it's time for church to rise up. It's Kairos time- for the churches aroud to wake up and take the call. But why is our heart so complacent and so hard to move? Am questioning myself too- wht is God calling me in the area of evangelism, or mission? Awaken the Sleeping Giant....awaken that sleeping giant, awaken- Wake up. Now is the time! Can't you see it? Open our Spiritual Blindness eyes. The Word is there, the Word is life, how are we receiving it? Are we hungry and long for His Word?
O Lord, forgive us for being sleeping, a sleeping giant. Over contented, complacency, blinded by the worldly system, our eyes has not seen our ear has not heard, our heart has not understand what You're doing admist of us. Forgive us Lord, for building our own houses, and forgetting your altar, Your house. Forgive us for pitching the tents so many times, yet never laid any altar..How wretch of us. Yet You loves us, you loves me and give Your life for me- on the Cross of Calvary. That precious blood, the gift of life, how can we comprehend. Help me not to loose the focus of such love and free gifts. It's time- Open the eyes of my Heart Lord!
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Earliest Sleeping Time
7th February 2006,
8.42am, last night was my earliest sleeping time- 10am already Zzzzz, so sweet and sound, plan to adjust the clock to wake up early in the morning 6am, but keep on snooze my H/P alarm each time it ring. Oh dear...I'm so lazy, battling to wake up. End up- praying in prostrate position- praying for family and working place. Babbling through, decided to put on my feet to wake up. Oh, Shirley- what a discipline. Got to work out my body, sleep early rise up early. Oh, now I feel even as I slept for more than 8 hours, yet the body and bones seems so tired and rusty, is that sign of aging? Or, got to plan for something more challenging to do.
Today Ms Tan, my store-keeper on leave. Anything happen to the stock issue will come to me. Am not very happy to handle stock issue- always have the idea pharmacist's job should not concern stock- it's more of patient-care but the situation now has change. Am I being content in such job scope? In term of management, how has I been contributing, and whether did I grow in higher level dealing with managing staff and issues.
O Lord, grant me wisdom today, that every decision making and each speech from my mouth will be guided with Your Spirit, that whatever I do, let me do it for You and not of pleasing man alone. Oh Lord, guide me today- grant me strength and joy in marketplace- let me be a testimony, touching a life today. Amen!
8.42am, last night was my earliest sleeping time- 10am already Zzzzz, so sweet and sound, plan to adjust the clock to wake up early in the morning 6am, but keep on snooze my H/P alarm each time it ring. Oh dear...I'm so lazy, battling to wake up. End up- praying in prostrate position- praying for family and working place. Babbling through, decided to put on my feet to wake up. Oh, Shirley- what a discipline. Got to work out my body, sleep early rise up early. Oh, now I feel even as I slept for more than 8 hours, yet the body and bones seems so tired and rusty, is that sign of aging? Or, got to plan for something more challenging to do.
Today Ms Tan, my store-keeper on leave. Anything happen to the stock issue will come to me. Am not very happy to handle stock issue- always have the idea pharmacist's job should not concern stock- it's more of patient-care but the situation now has change. Am I being content in such job scope? In term of management, how has I been contributing, and whether did I grow in higher level dealing with managing staff and issues.
O Lord, grant me wisdom today, that every decision making and each speech from my mouth will be guided with Your Spirit, that whatever I do, let me do it for You and not of pleasing man alone. Oh Lord, guide me today- grant me strength and joy in marketplace- let me be a testimony, touching a life today. Amen!
Monday, February 06, 2006
The Ever Funniest Dream
6th February 2006,
5.08pm Monday evening. After CNY holidays, momentum doesn't seem to pick up, still lazy around. February gonna be great. Last Sunday sermon was just so good- about Man of Honor, not just focus on man alone, but also applied to women as well. About hw I'm living my life, between Bethel and Ai, between Godliness and worldliness. It's always a challenge, life always a challenge. I realize so many things about myself, some weakness coated with strength. How do i use it. Yes, it's not difficult to get a degree but not education. Education comes from above, wisdom from experience, life experience, learning to pick up when you fall. Learning to not repeat the errors again when you're wrongly walk on it. It need constant reminder- the inner being should be strong, the background and basic should be strong. I desire that Lord- help me, I'm willing to be broken, painful but I wanna hear You Lord, pls speak Your Word of wisdom and my heart will hear you, my heart will hear You and be still, and know You are Lord, You are Who I am that is speaking the very Word. Continue to soften my heart. To be soft when it's required to be soft, and to be strong and hard when it's suppose to be. Your time.
The title of my blog is about my dream- it's just so funny, and I think I've told a lot of the people I met, and have a good laugh over it. I seldom get dreams, and this time it's so real- that's why I thot of maybe write in this blog- next time if I ever read back I'll just laugh at myself. The story is like that: I was so tired, after all the play, lack of sleep, sleep almost 1.30am every night. Too "Hong So" (Joanne called me that). And I eat quite much during CNY. Actually not really a lot, but don't know why I got this dream. I dreamt that I eat a whole lot during Chinese New Year, all the leftover food, all the beer, and all the biscuit that laid on the living room table. Then one day, I weigh myself- I looked down the scale, Oh Shirley! It's 100kg. Oh No!!!! Oh NO!!, then I woke up, and literally I woke up and check my body..Realize that the fats is normal, my normal fats only. Thanks God. Wow, what a revelation, maybe God wanna remind me to keep my body more in shape, or it's just a warning that "Shirley- if you don't control your diet- you gonna end up like that- don't say I didn't warn you- self control my dear". Hmm..makes me scare of eating too much. The day after the incidence, I remember, Sat I went to work, I didn't take food from morning till afternoon- I wish I can skip dinner, but too hungry, got to eat:) Oh dear..I got to work out my body. Need to reduce fats- so I determine to use the TonicFlex every nite before I sleep, hope it able to work well:) Determine wor...cakap saja kah Shirley? Dun cakap only, must loose weight! Jia You! Jia You!...
5.08pm Monday evening. After CNY holidays, momentum doesn't seem to pick up, still lazy around. February gonna be great. Last Sunday sermon was just so good- about Man of Honor, not just focus on man alone, but also applied to women as well. About hw I'm living my life, between Bethel and Ai, between Godliness and worldliness. It's always a challenge, life always a challenge. I realize so many things about myself, some weakness coated with strength. How do i use it. Yes, it's not difficult to get a degree but not education. Education comes from above, wisdom from experience, life experience, learning to pick up when you fall. Learning to not repeat the errors again when you're wrongly walk on it. It need constant reminder- the inner being should be strong, the background and basic should be strong. I desire that Lord- help me, I'm willing to be broken, painful but I wanna hear You Lord, pls speak Your Word of wisdom and my heart will hear you, my heart will hear You and be still, and know You are Lord, You are Who I am that is speaking the very Word. Continue to soften my heart. To be soft when it's required to be soft, and to be strong and hard when it's suppose to be. Your time.
The title of my blog is about my dream- it's just so funny, and I think I've told a lot of the people I met, and have a good laugh over it. I seldom get dreams, and this time it's so real- that's why I thot of maybe write in this blog- next time if I ever read back I'll just laugh at myself. The story is like that: I was so tired, after all the play, lack of sleep, sleep almost 1.30am every night. Too "Hong So" (Joanne called me that). And I eat quite much during CNY. Actually not really a lot, but don't know why I got this dream. I dreamt that I eat a whole lot during Chinese New Year, all the leftover food, all the beer, and all the biscuit that laid on the living room table. Then one day, I weigh myself- I looked down the scale, Oh Shirley! It's 100kg. Oh No!!!! Oh NO!!, then I woke up, and literally I woke up and check my body..Realize that the fats is normal, my normal fats only. Thanks God. Wow, what a revelation, maybe God wanna remind me to keep my body more in shape, or it's just a warning that "Shirley- if you don't control your diet- you gonna end up like that- don't say I didn't warn you- self control my dear". Hmm..makes me scare of eating too much. The day after the incidence, I remember, Sat I went to work, I didn't take food from morning till afternoon- I wish I can skip dinner, but too hungry, got to eat:) Oh dear..I got to work out my body. Need to reduce fats- so I determine to use the TonicFlex every nite before I sleep, hope it able to work well:) Determine wor...cakap saja kah Shirley? Dun cakap only, must loose weight! Jia You! Jia You!...
Saturday, February 04, 2006
Saturday...7th Day of CNY
4th February 2006,
It's Saturday, 1.13pm to be exact. Whole week of rest for CNY has been a refreshing one, even though got some spike here and there, overall, God is so good. Today nothing much in work. Early morning got angpow from Boey, cute little Kitty angpow, then a request from Choong to take leave during May. I've been reluctant to release her for leave, we has some arguement and she almost cry- I've not been mean, she should able to understand the condition. Can't always demand own ways. She complaints that it's stressful working here, and she waana leave Pharmacy and prefer to transfer other department. Am really don't know how to handle such person. I don't want to say yes to her, even though I can allow her to take leave. Make it hard so tht people will not make use and take advantage of the leave. Bad eh?
Has been a while didn't write blog- just do so before logging off for another week. Am planning on the CDR Room- don't know that I got to be architect also for the requirement of the CDR for 2007. No experience, but trusting God and take slow step each step at a time, pray the Lord to guide me.
Yesterday attended Jon's CG- Mawar CG. There're quite a numbers in the Cell- Jon and Esthers, Pauline and Terry, Pr. Mei and Pr. Eddy, Pr. Samuel and Pricilla, Angeline and Becky (Phillipino), Loon, Uncle Andy and Desmond, Anthony (Indian guy). Who else I left out- yeah, Susie and Asley. Big group, such a strength and dynamic in the group, got family, couples, single. The worship was just great, accapella worship yet it's so full of the heart. It's so nice to sing without music, without any musical instrument. The Words shared was great. I'm so encouraged. The word is on Cahpter 6: The Ambassodors of Christ, taken from 2 Cor 5. The sharing initisally quite boring- more of theology and bible verses- then turn out to be very much practical and down to earth. 2 things that capture my attention. How are we Christian different fron the non-believers? How are we being as His Ambassodors in working place? There're so many good people around- so many very well manannered and good people around us, but what makes us stand out? To truly stand out as the light of the world? It's not just of doing good- coz everybody doing good nowadays. But it should be more, doing more good, exceedingly, higher standard. What others can't do and we do? What's so different?
Second- all our works should be compelled by love, overflow by love. That should be the fuel, by love. Others probably do good out of motives to get acceptance and approval by others, getting promotion or make ourselves feel good about it, or feel high. But what about us? Why do we continue want to strive giving the best, motivated by love, by what the Lord has done for us- because we had tasted that he is good. Are we tasting the goodness of God, or else how do we share the sweetness to the rest when we don't? So many Christians has been so comfortable, did not carry the light, or don't bother to share, because maybe we has long not tasted God, not enabling ourselves soak in His Word and Promises and in His love. If we don't be Ambassodors, who else? Who else can reach to the world? Oh God, such a standard- need His infilling- daily, let the cup be fulled and overflowing so that others will just see the goodness, the difference.
Pondering my life in working world, have I been faithful in His calling to be minister in working place? Have I been faithful, and taking the opportunity to love, to be Christlike? In the midst of the politics and the backbiting, where do I stand? Have I been different, standing in the gap to pray and to channel Hos love through me? O Lord, forgive me of my short-coming, that many times I shut my heart from those unlovable people, that I've compromise on the worldly standard and scheme and games played. Help me to stand out as light, Your Light, Your Armor, Your Ambassodors, to stand out- that people will see Christ in us. Amen!
It's Saturday, 1.13pm to be exact. Whole week of rest for CNY has been a refreshing one, even though got some spike here and there, overall, God is so good. Today nothing much in work. Early morning got angpow from Boey, cute little Kitty angpow, then a request from Choong to take leave during May. I've been reluctant to release her for leave, we has some arguement and she almost cry- I've not been mean, she should able to understand the condition. Can't always demand own ways. She complaints that it's stressful working here, and she waana leave Pharmacy and prefer to transfer other department. Am really don't know how to handle such person. I don't want to say yes to her, even though I can allow her to take leave. Make it hard so tht people will not make use and take advantage of the leave. Bad eh?
Has been a while didn't write blog- just do so before logging off for another week. Am planning on the CDR Room- don't know that I got to be architect also for the requirement of the CDR for 2007. No experience, but trusting God and take slow step each step at a time, pray the Lord to guide me.
Yesterday attended Jon's CG- Mawar CG. There're quite a numbers in the Cell- Jon and Esthers, Pauline and Terry, Pr. Mei and Pr. Eddy, Pr. Samuel and Pricilla, Angeline and Becky (Phillipino), Loon, Uncle Andy and Desmond, Anthony (Indian guy). Who else I left out- yeah, Susie and Asley. Big group, such a strength and dynamic in the group, got family, couples, single. The worship was just great, accapella worship yet it's so full of the heart. It's so nice to sing without music, without any musical instrument. The Words shared was great. I'm so encouraged. The word is on Cahpter 6: The Ambassodors of Christ, taken from 2 Cor 5. The sharing initisally quite boring- more of theology and bible verses- then turn out to be very much practical and down to earth. 2 things that capture my attention. How are we Christian different fron the non-believers? How are we being as His Ambassodors in working place? There're so many good people around- so many very well manannered and good people around us, but what makes us stand out? To truly stand out as the light of the world? It's not just of doing good- coz everybody doing good nowadays. But it should be more, doing more good, exceedingly, higher standard. What others can't do and we do? What's so different?
Second- all our works should be compelled by love, overflow by love. That should be the fuel, by love. Others probably do good out of motives to get acceptance and approval by others, getting promotion or make ourselves feel good about it, or feel high. But what about us? Why do we continue want to strive giving the best, motivated by love, by what the Lord has done for us- because we had tasted that he is good. Are we tasting the goodness of God, or else how do we share the sweetness to the rest when we don't? So many Christians has been so comfortable, did not carry the light, or don't bother to share, because maybe we has long not tasted God, not enabling ourselves soak in His Word and Promises and in His love. If we don't be Ambassodors, who else? Who else can reach to the world? Oh God, such a standard- need His infilling- daily, let the cup be fulled and overflowing so that others will just see the goodness, the difference.
Pondering my life in working world, have I been faithful in His calling to be minister in working place? Have I been faithful, and taking the opportunity to love, to be Christlike? In the midst of the politics and the backbiting, where do I stand? Have I been different, standing in the gap to pray and to channel Hos love through me? O Lord, forgive me of my short-coming, that many times I shut my heart from those unlovable people, that I've compromise on the worldly standard and scheme and games played. Help me to stand out as light, Your Light, Your Armor, Your Ambassodors, to stand out- that people will see Christ in us. Amen!
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